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Showing posts from June, 2014

How to Survive the Zombie Apocalypse

It's getting all zombie apocalypse-ish around these parts. This is Las Vegas, and therefore it is probably one of the most likely places to suffer the first round of brain-eating in a zombie invasion. After all, lots of gamblers and pleasure seekers walk around the casino floors half dead to begin with. So they are natural candidates for zombie-hood. But let's be more specific here. I am the mother of 4 children, and the youngest is just 8 weeks old. Can you see where this is going? I'm saying that motherhood is like having your brains eaten and being turned into a monster from the grave. Personally, I think my own transformation has already begun. I walk around in a daze most of the time. I give those Las Vegas gamblers and pleasure seekers a run for their money when it comes to zombie-like behavior. Except my staggering around aimlessly is not by choice. The fact that they willingly choose to do other things at night besides sleep tells me their brains have clearly al...

White Eyebrows

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The other day as I was putting on makeup, or what I like to call my "face", I found a white eyebrow hair. WHITE. It was the weirdest thing I had experienced in a while, and that is surely saying something considering I just gave birth not too long ago. Pregnancy, labor and birth is pretty darn weird. I realize that having kids ages you from the inside out. Lack of sleep, extreme exercise of the patience muscle, and being on your feet all day tending to the house and kids will make you feel a hundred years old, even though when you see a picture of yourself you are surprised at how young you actually look.  But I was not expecting a white hair. I was especially not expecting a white eyebrow hair. I don't know about you, but my eyebrows are the window to my soul. No, not my eyes. My eyes are just sort of there. But my eyebrows express the full spectrum of emotion and feeling. They snap down in anger. Jump up in surprise. Lift up to smile. Sometimes they go rogue and onl...