Las Vegas Mama

I'm falling apart. Not mentally, because that were the case I would be running down the street screaming something really nonsensical and slightly disturbing. People would avert their eyes and think how sad it is that I am not locked up in a "safe environment". I mean I am falling apart physically. I do not know exactly when these things started happening to me, but suddenly I have a list of ailments to rival that of my 101 year old grandmother. I think this means that I am not aging gracefully. Wanna hear 'em? I have a cold, which is mostly over except it seems to have moved into my lungs. I hate when stuff is in my lungs. At least if I had a parasite or something then I would have an interesting story to tell. Instead I just have a chest cold. Lame. I need a parasite. My right shoulder is in constant pain. Some time in the year after Violet was born my joints started giving out. Apparently sleeping on my side was too strenuous for my shoulder to take. Sleeping...

Hippies Cemeteries Baby falling asleep in your arms so deeply that their thumb drops out of their mouth and they don't even flinch

I want to clean the house. Really, I do. I am going to do it. Soon. I just have to do a little shopping first. Source

...you wake up in the baby's room at 4am and try to comfort her for no apparent reason.

Have you ever been so tired that you fall asleep in a strange position for a really long time? I did t hat this morning after fetching Violet from her room and bringing her into my bed for some early morning napping. An hour later, I woke up with the right side of my face and neck completely numb. If I had been less groggy I would have tried to chase the girls around the house like a deranged female Phantom of the Opera... and not even the romantic crooning Phantom that my half-face resembled. I would have been the scary Lon Chaney version. Only much scarier because of my fierce morning dragon breath and my sleep-tangled hair.