Socks are My Enemy
I want to know what the deal is with socks. I am talking about tiny kid-sized socks, and how they seem to mysteriously migrate all over the house, usually without their mate.
How do they get into those strange places? I have found socks (or should I say a sock) under beds, in toy boxes, in dress up purses, in shoe boxes, on the kitchen table, balled up in my purse, in the pots and pans, and in my bed under the covers like it had been tucked in for the night. This happens even after I confiscated all socks from the children and put them in a drawer they could not reach.
And how is it that they are separated from their mate, and their mate can never, ever be found? Loads of laundry can be washed and dried, and there will be no sign of the sock's mate for months. Then one day, the missing sock will turn up somewhere - totally innocently as though it had been there all along.
I am starting to see a sock conspiracy by sock-making companies to force you to buy more socks. I am starting to think that kid socks they are actually robo-socks. They are implanted with tiny little microchips and tiny little robo-legs that help them move about and avoid detection like creepy, colorful spiders. Ew.
Now I am going to have to turn corners warily at night if its dark, for fear of encountering a creepy robo-sock. I am pretty sure this is the most logical explanation as to where they are all going.
How do they get into those strange places? I have found socks (or should I say a sock) under beds, in toy boxes, in dress up purses, in shoe boxes, on the kitchen table, balled up in my purse, in the pots and pans, and in my bed under the covers like it had been tucked in for the night. This happens even after I confiscated all socks from the children and put them in a drawer they could not reach.
And how is it that they are separated from their mate, and their mate can never, ever be found? Loads of laundry can be washed and dried, and there will be no sign of the sock's mate for months. Then one day, the missing sock will turn up somewhere - totally innocently as though it had been there all along.
I am starting to see a sock conspiracy by sock-making companies to force you to buy more socks. I am starting to think that kid socks they are actually robo-socks. They are implanted with tiny little microchips and tiny little robo-legs that help them move about and avoid detection like creepy, colorful spiders. Ew.
Now I am going to have to turn corners warily at night if its dark, for fear of encountering a creepy robo-sock. I am pretty sure this is the most logical explanation as to where they are all going.
No lie: my youngest does not have one single pair of socks right now. When we went to the bounce place, he had to wear the only 2 mis-matched ones I could find. Socks are the enemey.(why does that not look right? enemey? enemy? help me.)
ReplyDeleteI hate socks! I hate folding socks. I hate washing socks. I hate putting socks on. I hate socks!!
ReplyDeleteI am so glad I am not the only one :)
I know Ana, right?!?!?! They are an awful, no-good, wicked necessity.
ReplyDeleteNBM- Its "enemy" ;)
Abandon all hope. That conspiracy, and it is not just a theory, has been going on since socks were invented. Simple solution? Used the unmatch socks until all disappear, then get just one kind, one color socks (better grey or beige color and launder no more than once a week... mmm... you might also need clothes pins for your nose, though)
ReplyDeleteI also have a sock issue. I don't think this is a problem with just kid socks, adults have also been infected including me. I've tried to ameliorate the problem by buying multiple of the same kind and it that way I can have a pair while another decides to appear.
ReplyDeleteI have a HUGE sock issue. Every morning we go to the sock basket and hope that magically, overnight a mate has appeared to go with one of the one hundred socks in the basket. It's just sad.
ReplyDeleteSeems like so far the best solution would be to buy them all the same color!!!
ReplyDelete