Do the Math

Last night bedtime was at 11pm, courtesy of Ivy's fear of monsters. This morning was a 5:30am wake up call, courtesy of Ivy's nightmare regarding monsters. This whole monster-fear-nightmare situation is killing me, but I think that may be a separate post.

Today I also tried to visit a new place to review, and it was no longer in business, those slackers. I then tried a second place, which it seems does not open until 3pm. EVEN BIGGER SLACKERS.

I hate math with a passion, but I think I got this one down:

Lack of sleep + dumb slackers = irritation.

When you add to that the usual kid challenges that happen on a daily basis, you get:

Irritation + kids drawing on themselves with crayon = anger

When we got home from the failed outing I tried to put them both down for a much needed nap. What I mean is that I really needed a nap. Due to above said anger, I lost total patience with having Violet sleep in bed with me (she still pinches the muppets. How do I wean her from muppet-pinching???) She was majorly upset at having to sleep in her own bed and cried and wailed loud enough to split my eardrums.

Anger + screaming × impatience = total shutdown of mommy-ness

This means I no longer cared she was screaming. I did not care that Ivy was trying to sleep and Violet was screaming. I left them in their room to fend for themselves and went to bed. Eventually they sort of settled down even though Ivy ended up not sleeping at all, probably because the window of sleepiness had totally passed her by.

 I fell asleep for a little while, not long enough to refresh my mommy superpowers, but long enough to remind me how much I love sleep and how it is the unattainable dream.

Total shutdown of mommy-ness ÷ too short of a nap = desperate hopelessness

Since I still have grocery shopping to do, dinner to make, house to clean, and choir rehearsal to go to, the desperate hopelessness is pretty much magnified by 100.


Desperate hopelessness × 100 ± kid surprises yet to come = nothing I can do about it, so may as well get on with my life and stop complaining

And I do believe I have come through the other side. I think I am ok now. Sigh.

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