Ninja Baby

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How to Look Like a Rock Star

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Having a baby and being exhausted a lot of the time makes me feel really old and decrepit. Sometimes I see a picture of myself and I am surprised by how young I look, simply because I feel so old. And something about feeling old makes me want to at least fake youthfulness. In fact, I think this is what you call a mid-life crisis. Or a mid-childbearing crisis. I don't want to be matronly. I don't want to be called "Ma'am". I want to be youthful and be called "Miss". Sure, the correct term for a married woman with 3 children is "Ma'am". But I am throwing convention to the wind here because I pretty much want to pretend. I want to get hip. Be cool again (ok, I've never actually been cool, but I did say this was for pretends). So I took a little trip down to the fantastic Euphoria Salon for some  help. Here is before, at home with the baby. Clearly something needs to be done with those split ends either way. Soooo.... let's cho
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How to Potty Train

Wow, I have really been slacking on the blog posts. But I have a reason for that, truly I do. In fact, I even dropped a hint of it in my last post, but NO ONE noticed! I think I am going to wait a while and see if anyone can come up with a good guess. Not that I blame you for missing the hint, it was subtle. In the meantime, since the last post and now, I will update you on what else has been going on. I have actually potty trained Violet, and that went so remarkably well that I really could not say anything sarcastic about it. Which is a shame, because you know how much I enjoy my sarcasm. And how sad I get when I cannot take aim and shoot it at people or things like little stinging bullets... pew! pew! pew! So the very first day Violet was at the potty like a champ. Inside of a week she was completely potty trained. I would like to brag about how fantastic I am, and about how I am the. best. mom. ever.  But the truth is that Violet was totally ready. Case in point, I noticed sh
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How to Battle Caffeine Addiction

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How can you battle caffeine addiction? Um, you tell me because I have no idea and I've been struggling hard against becoming addicted to caffeine. Heck, I even struggle against the idea of needing something like caffeine to get through my day. But the truth is that caffeine is like having a secret mommy superpower. Caffeine makes me brave. Caffeine makes me want to live my life to the fullest. I can accomplish things when I have had coffee. It...dare I say it? It makes me a better person. For example, when getting ready to go to the park with the kids, I normally just throw whatever on myself and the kids, and walk out the door. But when I have had coffee it makes me do crazy things like care about our appearance.   And, because I am nursing my 2 month old, she can also accomplish amazing things. When I have had coffee, I can do a million things at once - like clean everything while talking on the phone with caffeine-less friends, nurse the baby , and just about anythin
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